These days Social become synonyms with Online Social Media. We all know that there is more social in our lives than an internet social media is.
We usually greet people with Good Morning or how are you doing, and that is all of it. It is good but is also expected in general. You need to make a positive impression on people so that they remember the memory that it creates and link that memory to you. When it happens for quite a few times, people will start liking you. It is like increasing your deposit of positiveness & likeability with every opportunity. You can do increase this deposit whether you are meeting people face to face or communicating over phone, mail, chat or a video conference.
Sometimes like in interviews, sales, the immediate outcome depends on how people like us. Also, many of us also struggle with other people accepting or liking us. So here are some of the tips about how to make people like you.
How to make people like you when you are with them?
Show People that you care about them
Ask People about things like their kids, family or their favorite sport. Enquire about their health in case they are recently facing any health issues. Enquire about the wellbeing about their elderly parents, if you know about them. I suggest you know about them very well in case they are the people whom you are going to spend a lot of time like your colleagues.
Appreciate them, whether individual or a group
A keen observation and a taste for empathy takes you a long way in making people like you. In case you are hurry every time, you do not get time to observe and talk to people. Observe any difference when you meet people and appreciate that, it can be a new dress, a new haircut. You can also appreciate them for their achievements that you are familiar with. In case you are addressing a group of people, make sure you also appreciate the group rather than just limiting to one or two people. Do not hold back and feel like your appreciation may look like unnatural. When people are happy they do not analyze much about why it makes them happy and reason about it.
Make people empowered by seeking their help
Many people spend their lives doing routine tasks, following instructions, mostly being led. Particularly children, elderly people at home, domestic help, people working in entry-level jobs, etc. It is rare that a teenager yelling back to elders to stop preaching or instructing. Even many employees leave their company or their bosses, when they think they are not empowered but just instructed.
By asking their advice or seeking a favor, you are not making things easy for you, but also making other people feel powerful. Who is giving them the opportunity, it’s is you.
Do not take people for Granted
It is very common that we start to take people for granted once we are in a comfortable zone in a relationship. Whether it is a spouse, your parents, friends, colleagues, or any people for say. These people respect and love you. But once you started ignoring them or keep demanding, basically you are turning them away.
Be appreciative, use thank you, reciprocate with actions or gifts. It will make feel good.
It does not matter what you are and what you have achieved unless you are humble and stay among people. Many people have expressed this particular concern to me and I too can feel it sometimes about me. Do not try to act like you or your life is perfect, we all have flaws. People feel comfortable with those who are similar to them.
Often call people by their Name
It makes people very much happy when they are called by their name, they feel that you care for them. If you do not know their name, you can always seek the name. They like the extra effort you are taking to know about them. Remembering people’s Names pays rich dividends too, many famous leaders are very good at this.
But you need to know that, in some cultures calling elder people by name is considered offensive. So it would help in case you can personalize by knowing how they are called in their cultures.
Enquire about personal things
Enquire people about their personal things like Health, Family, elder Parents, their favorite sports teams, and how they are doing in their work or studies.
Try to share your personal things also with people, do not overdo though. When you people feel that you trust them, they reciprocate it.
Let them talk
People hate when you cut in between making the stop talking abruptly. They feel like they are not values and you are arrogant. Sometimes your point of view may be right, but it can wait for some more seconds. When people feel you are listening to them carefully, they like you and they consider what you say.
Reflect them – The commonalities bonds individuals
Most of the People usually likes about them, whether it is about their looks, their opinions, their choices or their achievements. You can find many commonalities between you when you care and start knowing people. When people feel that you are similar to them, they will be more positive about you. They see themselves in you.
Maintain Right Body Language when you meet new people
When you are meeting new people for family, pleasure or for work, try to maintain a right body language sending positive signals. Look confident, Smile often and maintain eye contact. Avoid Negative expressions like Hesitation, very low or high voice, turning away and talking, etc. Be careful that in some cultures maintaining eye contact is considered either aggressive or intimidating.
Avoid three Cs
Avoid too much of Comparison, Criticism and Complaining. Often we do this with an intention of doing good, but we end up doing the opposite. We have to be happy and content with what we are receiving from people and for that, they are able to achieve. Otherwise, we will end up criticizing or complaining about them often than we think we are doing. Nobody likes a lot of criticism, irrespective of your position (Parent, Boss, Spouse, Teacher, etc)
Spend time with People
When people hang around with you, they know you better and they will start liking you for the good things. You too get time to know them and improve your relation accordingly.
How to make people like you when you are not with them?
Send them feel good and caring messages
When you send messages with positive content to people, they bring positive emotions to them. It makes them feel more cared for and connected with you. Try to keep the messages genuine with a personal touch. These days with Social Media and mobiles receive a lot of messages, but you can make difference with a genuine and well thought through a message.
Send them Gifts
A gift always makes a person happy, this is how we are made from our childhood. It makes them feel cared. Sometimes it is expected you gift them in functions or occasions, you have to follow the norms here. But sometimes you can make people like you by sending them surprising gifts when they are not expected.
Do not talk on their Back
Trust and integrity are very essential to hold a strong personality. People do not like others who have a weaker personality. Although a little gossip is okay, when you talk about people on their back, you basically are creating your enemy. Forget about that they liking you any time.
When a person knows that you recommended them for certain work or personal matters, they not only feel great but also respect you very much. More often than less, these recommendations reciprocate. It works that way both personally as well as in Business.
Praise about them
Praise people in public, individuals and groups for all the good things they are about, do not criticize or complain too much. Send people thankyou notes for direct or indirect help you are your known ones got from them.
Do you have experiences that worked for you and you would like to share? Please feel free and comment here.